Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
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