Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
She's the barista slut.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
