So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I am one with the molecules
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You ate ashes out of my bong
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
