Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
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