i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
