it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
