He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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