If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
it was like his penis was on wheels.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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