She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
