I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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