we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
