I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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