What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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