Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
pray to the hookup gods
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize
