He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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