# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
