I need help removing her.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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