Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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