I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
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