Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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