If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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