Buhtt sex?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
