Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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