If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
