So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
foreskin is a definite game changer
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
