It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
