6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
