So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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