in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Terrible idea I love it
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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