If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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