kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize