I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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