Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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