escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
