I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Randomize
