Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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