shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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