I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Couch. On fire.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
