Midget sex pt 2 tonight
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
