i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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