She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
