paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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