Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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