how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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