Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Fuck appropriateness.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Randomize
