Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
