honey bunches of taint.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Randomize
