i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
