My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
