I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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